If you ask guys from all over the world what the best kind of relationship is to have, they will definitely agree that it is friends with benefits. After all, officially speaking, you and the girl will just be friends in this kind of setup. The only difference is that you will get to enjoy other benefits from your friendship that regular friendships don’t normally come with. While it would be great to say that friends with benefits don’t have any downsides, though, the truth is that there is a bit of a catch when it comes down to it.
Friends With Benefits (Rules To Obey)
As with any other relationship out there, feelings can get stirred up with friends with benefits; and if you don’t manage those feelings properly, you could end up with some serious problems on your plate. So, to avoid unnecessary issues, here are the basic rules to obey when it comes to friends with benefits – rules that can help you get through any treacherous waters that may come your way in the process.
Rule Number One: Do not get romantically involved.
This is probably the most important tip of all. After all, if you start treating a girl as more than a friend, then she will start to expect things from you. If a girl is happy with this kind of relationship, then you are lucky that she is merely interested in the sex. However, you have to make sure that you don’t think of it as more yourself, either. The point of this type of relationship is to help one another get rid of sexual tension. So, if you start feeling romantic things for each other, you will need to start reassessing your situation as soon as possible.
In fact, it would be best to mention that feelings are in play the minute you feel them. This way, you can avoid getting hurt in the long run. Who knows? You might find out that there is an actual chance for a relationship there if you open up to her. However, you should also be prepared in case she decides to terminate your relationship altogether because she simply isn’t ready for anything serious. Either way, if feelings start popping up, it would be best to stop having sex altogether until you have discussed your next plan of action.
Rule Number Two: Make sure you are sexually attractive at all times.
If a girl stops seeing you as a sexual attraction, then you can be sure that the sex will end along with it. As such, you have to make sure that you are sexually attractive at all times. To do this, just drop a few sexual jokes and innuendos every now and then, but make sure you aren’t vulgar when it comes down to it. Just be slow and subtle. The key is to make the girl see you sexually.
Once you start talking and mentioning sex, try to gauge her reactions and see whether she is disgusted or amused by you. Her reactions should then determine whether it is alright for you to keep going or whether it is time for you to step away from the playing field altogether. While it could definitely take time and effort to create and maintain sexual tension, but it would definitely be a necessity when it comes to being friends with benefits.
Rule Number Three: Stay in the know.
This might sound extremely simple, but guys tend to forget to ask girls about what they want. If you have already created some sexual tension and have already established that you are friends with benefits, keep checking in and seeing if you are still on the same level.
Don’t worry about offending her when it comes to this. If she seems offended, just apologize and make sure she knows that you are merely asking to make sure that things are still okay between you. If, at any point, she decides that she no longer wants to have those benefits with you; then ask her whether you can at least be friends after everything or not.
Rule Number Four: Always practice safe sex.
There is no excuse around this; always stay safe. Not only will this protect you from unwanted pregnancies, but it will also protect you from sexually transmitted diseases. Even if she happens to be on the pill and even though it feels better without a condom, always put one on and stay safe. Besides, it will make her feel like you respect her more at the same time.
Rule Number Five: Set your priorities straight.
Balance is of the utmost importance here, as well. Make sure that your relationship isn’t taking away anything important from your life. In other words, don’t prioritize her over your education or your job, your friends or your family, no matter how great the sex may be. Since you aren’t in an actual relationship, you should be able to live your life independently as if she doesn’t even play a big part in it at all. In other words, keep things in perspective and don’t let the great sex blind you.
Naturally, it goes without saying that you both have to be single in order to be friends with benefits to begin with. This is what makes the setup so great to begin with. Another great thing about it is that you can stay friends for as long as you want to, even after one or both of you ends up in a relationship and the benefits end.
The last thing that you need to remember is that the rules mentioned in this article should be established early on along with the rules of staying completely non-committal and purely physical – nothing else. As great as being friends with benefits might be, all of these rules are essential to the game. In fact, if you do not follow the basic guidelines above, you might as well forget about looking for a friend that you can benefit from altogether instead of ruining the experience.